Interest Myself In Me

I know Facebook skews people’s lives so that their seem more interesting than the day in, day out probably is in reality. I’m aware that everyone can’t possibly have a glamorous life where they travel all the time and achieve major accomplishments every other day. Everyone works on a daily basis in some capacity whether it’s a job or being a stay at home parent. I know as well as the next person there are ups and downs in everything.

So then why do I feel so boring? I know that this is a phase in my life where my focus isn’t on myself. I know that raising my kids is important. I know that even if it feels like nothing, getting through each day with them is a big deal.

Still, I wish I was doing something alongside raising my kids that was more interesting. Maybe it’s more that I need to feed my soul. As corny as that may sound, I need to keep myself more well-rounded to make me happy. It’s still work-life balance. It’s a little bit skewed to work right now since my kids are so young but I need to add more life back in so that I don’t feel one-sided.

I remember, before kids, if I ever felt boring, I would try to find something that made me interesting to myself. Granted, my time is a little more limited now but I want to maintain this practice. I want to feel like I can accomplish things. I want to be able to set goals and know what it feels like to achieve them. It might be harder now but I think it’s important for my own mental and emotional health to try.

What do you do to keep yourself interesting? What are your goals and passions?

Who Am I?

Who am I?

I am a woman, a wife, a mom. I am a daughter, a sister, a daughter-in-law. I am an accountant, a former dancer, a choreographer, a writer.

But in the middle of all of this, who am I?

I am someone that everyone else also is. I am just trying to feel important, to be myself, to be special. I am someone and I am no one.

How many of us feel this way? How many of us feel like we haven’t changed in a while or that we are stuck?

There was a time in my life I was moving constantly. I had places to go and things to do. Life changes. I felt important and needed in a different way that I am needed now. It keeps going and sometimes, until we stop to take a look, we don’t realize that everything around us has also changed.

But we haven’t changed. We seem to be in the same place that we were.

How do we remain people that we recognize? Will we always be restless when we are stagnant? Or is it okay to be content with your life however it is currently?

Should we be putting in more effort to be interesting, to be challenged? Is being happy the same as being accepting? Or should we try to change our life to be what we imagine?

It seems as though, every few years, I have to reinvent myself to catch up with the times. It’s like I suddenly wake up and realize that I need to move forward as well.

What do you do to keep moving forward? What do you do to find your happiness?

Things Change

I haven’t written a blog post in over 10 months. There was a reason for that. In that time, I had my first child. Pregnancy is such an interesting time period in a woman’s life. There are those for whom it’s the most amazing time in their lives and there are those where it is the hardest 40 weeks they will go to. And then, there’s the stuff that no one ever tells you. I get it. In the end, you have this really cute baby that is a part of you and your significant other. You have now created a family. There’s so much you go through to get there and no one can fully prepare you for everything. I’d like to try to talk about it honestly. The good, the bad, and the ugly. My entries won’t just be about pregnancy but also the changes as a result and it will always continue to be about things in the world that I have opinions about. So I hope you enjoy the return of Who We Are Today.

One of the biggest things no one ever talks about is that you become a parent the second that positive sign comes up on a pregnancy test. Every little thing you do, you double check to see if it will affect the baby. I can’t tell you how many times I googled different types of food and drinks to make sure that it wouldn’t be bad for the baby. It’s crazy how many things you can’t eat or drink. It makes you wonder what our parents did without internet over 30 plus years ago. I also wonder if everyone is as paranoid as I was with what was happening as my baby developed or if I was just crazy. I sometimes forget the age of my baby based on when she was born. I consider her age to be that of when I found out I was pregnant. Once you become a parent, that’s it. There’s no going back.

Another┬áthing no one ever tells you is 40 weeks is a long, long time. If you count that there are 4 weeks in a month, it’s actually 10 months. If you count there are more than 4 weeks in a month, it’s actually somewhere between 9 and 10 months. Trust me, when you’re throwing up every day or your legs hurt or you’re just craving sushi, it’s a long time. You just have to get through it.

I had to keep reminding myself that a lot of women go through all of this every day. It doesn’t feel like that though. It feels like you’re the only one in the world and no one can understand it.

Pregnancy is definitely an interesting phase of life. The one thing you always hear women say, though, is no matter how tough it was, it was definitely worth it.