Politics

I’ve tried to avoid writing about politics because there is so much of it around us right now. Every other article is about politics and what is happening everywhere. I know that I usually need a break from it.

But I thought I’d dedicate one post about it.

Here is my basic opinion: I could have accepted anyone who eventually won the presidency regardless of their politics and where they stood on issues. But I can’t accept someone who won while inciting hate.

I can’t remember a time when a president won (and I’ve been able to vote in 6 elections as of today) where there were hate crimes during and after the campaign. I can’t ever remember being scared to leave the house during and after a campaign because people might be rude to me because I am Indian even though I was born in America.

I live in California which is maybe in the running for the most liberal state in the country. Yet, I still had these thoughts. I still worried about my kids and how they would be treated when we left the house.

This is what I am gauging the election results on. This is why I have trouble accepting the president. If he can’t make me feel safe in my own home, then why is he my leader?

There are plenty of issues with the new president. But, for me, the primary issue is that he encouraged people who harbored hate for others. He encouraged them to show their true colors and make those of us of a different ethnicity feel unwanted.

And that I can’t accept.

 

Marriage is the start…not the end

So you just had the biggest day of your life and now you’ll live happily ever after, right?

Wrong.

It takes some time to get to the marriage point for some people. For some people, it doesn’t. But for everyone, it’s work after marriage. I haven’t met a couple that doesn’t require work to keep their marriage happy and successful.

The hardest part I think is learning to let go of your ego. The end goal is to be happy with the person and really progress together through life. Fights aren’t always worth being right. It’s really about choosing your battles.

We grow up in life learning to protect ourselves from the world. We learn to be tough and invincible so no one can hurt us. ┬áNo one warns us that that isn’t what works in marriage though. Part of being married is being vulnerable. It’s letting your guard down and accepting that you may not always be right. It’s accepting that sometimes even if you are right, you may have to let it go to move forward.

It’s hard not to fight and not to let things get under our skin. But what’s more important: being right all of the time or having a marriage that makes us happy?

This doesn’t mean to not address the problems. But believing that your significant other doesn’t have your best interest at heart is a problem. If you start with trust, it’ll be easier to get past the issues that come up. And trust me, a lot of issues always come up. Life happens. Finances, families, life curves. And if you have a strong partnership, it makes it so much easier to get through the tough times.

Marriage is hard work. That’s undeniable.

In the end, you just have to figure out how to work with the person that you have chosen to be your life partner. And that’s the start of a happy marriage.