Tag: practical

Do You Want to be Realistic or Do You Want to Dream?

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I want to dream. I wish I could get my mind to dream more than be overly logical like it is prone to do. I honestly do believe that people with big dreams make things happen in this world. 

We all dreamed more when we were younger. So what happened to that? When we were younger, we had vivid, crazy, imaginative dreams that never seemed unrealistic. We were not limited by anything. And now, at our current ages, we have learned to live in reality. 

I was trying to figure out the difference between myself at the age of 16 and now and honestly, it’s that I’ve stopped dreaming. It’s not that I don’t want more for myself. I just don’t daydream about things like I used to. It’s probably because I can send myself into reality too easily and can find ways to counteract the dream practically. 

I don’t want to do that. I want to let my imagination run wild and really use it to find what I want in life. I want to feel that feeling of achievement again. I have before and it was great. But once you have achieved your dreams, you have to find new dreams. That’s the difficult part. Most of us dreamed about our lives now when we were 16. What happens when you reach your 30s and those dreams have been realized? 

Half the fun of having a dream is actually just imagining what it will be like to get there. That’s what motivates you. That’s what keeps you moving forward every day. It’s important to have ever evolving dreams so that you can continue to progress in life. 

We should definitely enjoy our present. But we should also be able to dream about our future without any restrictions. So how do we get back to that phase in our lives where we can dream unconditionally? 

The Indian Kid Mentality

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Have you ever really wanted to do something but have trouble doing it without feeling guilty about it? If it’s for pure fun or maybe not the most logical, practical choice, the feelings of “why am I putting myself first?” manifest themselves inside you and then there is the famous tug of war between what we want and what we should do. Is it possible to be selfish for the good of ourselves when our conscience is in constant overdrive? Or is that just the voice of the Indian culture?

This idea of duty and responsibility is something I know I’ve dealt with and put on myself throughout my entire life. I don’t know how I came to think that way instead of doing what I wanted but it definitely was my own mind that put that pressure on me. My own ideas of what I thought I was supposed to be doing caused me to make the decisions that I make.

Until I get to that point where I realize that this isn’t what is making me happy. And that gets to a point where I know I need to make a change or I’ll be miserable.

So let’s discuss the “Indian kid mentality” as my friend called it yesterday. Why do we stick to certain things even if they don’t make us happy? I understand we are raised by a generation where they risked a lot to come to America and create a stable and opportunity filled life for us. Aren’t we obligated to take the next step and really try to make it a happy life? There are those that did break out of the standard but the majority of us still stuck to stability as our main driving force. What is it about quitting or ending something or changing something that scares us half to death? I even question myself before buying something that might be a little bit more expensive than normal.

Can anyone explain how we can really start listening to ourselves instead of pushing ourselves to the point of misery?

When Change Needs to Happen

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There are times like now where I literally have a hard time moving through the day because something major in my life needs to change. I’ve felt like this twice before. Once in college when I was someplace I didn’t like, studying something I didn’t enjoy. And the second time was at the end of a major relationship that I knew wasn’t going to last. 

Moving on is such a difficult decision to make. Everything you’re familiar with has to change.  Everything you’re comfortable with has to go. And you start feeling that you’re quitting on something you should accomplish. I take an unusually long time in the period of debate just to make sure I’m not making the wrong decision. Something I’ve figured out though is that change is usually for the better. Both times I have made major life decisions, I have come out better and much happier. 

These crossroads are our true tests in life. Some of us have an easier time than others believing we will come out on our feet no matter what. Some of us have a very difficult time giving up what we know for the fear that the unknown will bring us. It is scary to take risks even though we know that they might pay off. In my case, they did. Yet, I’m still terrified of making changes. I’ve seen risks others have taken pay off badly and I think this has affected my core instinct. My practical brain stays in charge even though my emotional brain is freaking out. 

You will know when you are in a negative situation that you need to get out of. The challenge is in actually taking that step. This is where you develop your strength. Knowing that the step is terrifying but taking it anyways will help us realize that we can survive anything. Even with knowing this though, it takes a lot of courage to make the change. Prolonging that change though will only make us feel worse though. 

What is the change that you know you need to make but haven’t made yet?