Are You Ambitious Too?

Ambition. It’s something that isn’t inherently in all of us. Well, at least, not in the same way. Some of us are ambitious about our careers, some of us are ambitious about our hobbies, some of us are ambitious about something else entirely. So how do it work when two people aren’t ambitious about the same thing?

Being a first generation raised in America Indian, most of us are taught to be ambitious about our careers. After all, most of our parents came over here and worked extremely hard so that we would get the opportunities to achieve whatever we wanted. So, of course, we should be taking advantage of that and do the best we can to take their successes a step further. Most of the people I have been raised with all have that same mindset.

Here’s the interesting part for me: not EVERYONE believes that as well. There are a few people I do know who haven’t achieved as much as they are capable of. I don’t know why they haven’t. I don’t know if it’s a lack of ambition or if there are other reasons. I don’t know if it’s something that’s inherited or if it’s just a personality thing.

I’ll be honest. I do judge people based on what is perceived as a lack of ambition. I can’t understand it because most of the people I know do have some sort of drive. And when I say ambition, I don’t just mean education-wise. It could be ambition in that person’s career or the way they raise their kids or their hobbies. I see interests that don’t just involve being social but to better themselves and the people around them in some way. But if I meet someone who doesn’t seem to want to do anything, I have a hard time understanding that person. I don’t think that too many people like this do exist though. Most people do have interests and want to accomplish something in life.

I think what’s important to understand is that two people won’t necessarily have the same ambitions. My husband knows I like to be involved in a lot of things. In the past, I have simultaneously worked, gone to school, and been involved in dance. But now, as a stay at home mom, that isn’t all possible. When we talked yesterday, he apologized to me for not being able to pursue my ambitions. The thing is that I can’t have the same goals when my role in life has changed. But what I can do is change my goals. While he follows his ambition to grow his career and business, I am following mine to raise my daughter and to develop other parts of my life (such as this blog) so that I feel fulfilled. And we both support each other. In the end, both of us should be able to positively influence my daughter’s life because she can see that even though we don’t necessarily share the same ambitions, we both will work hard to achieve something regardless of what it is. As long as we can figure out what we want to accomplish together as a couple and as parents, we can figure out how to get there with the other as support.

I’m Here…What Next?

Once you’ve accomplished most of the things that you used to dream about growing up, then what? It’s funny. I don’t think we learn to really dream past the marriage phase of life. Once we start our career and get married, the only thing really left is having kids, right?

Maybe I’m having a mid-life crisis in my 30s. I haven’t grown much in my career but I haven’t taken the steps to really grow since my last degree. I have a great marriage and I definitely pursue my hobbies. For someone who needs to keep growing, I’m not quite sure what the next step is.¬†On top of it, when did I get to a point where all my dreams have already been realized? When did we stop dreaming so that we have nothing left to achieve? How do you reactivate this part of you?

I believe that I’m supposed to just enjoy life to the fullest at this point and know that things are good and appreciate every minute of it. It’s hard because I’m the type to want to constantly work towards something. The minute things become settled, I get restless. How do you deal with this restlessness?

Occasionally, I do worry about the future but in reality, we are where we are and that’s exactly where we are supposed to be. That’s probably the best advice I’ve ever received in my life. So finding the next step will come. Opportunities show up when they are supposed to.

So why is it so hard to wait for them then? Is it bad that I want to know what’s going to happen now? Patience is a virtue but waiting really just sucks sometimes. The irony is that when I get to the point that I’m supposed to get to, I’ll know why it didn’t come any sooner. I just get impatient right now.

Am I the only person who has trouble enjoying the present?