A Letter To My Child

To my baby,

I don’t know what to say. I can’t believe you’re here. I’ve been waiting for you for a long time. Your father and I had to go through a lot before you came but you’re here now. Our perfect little baby.

I finally know what it means to watch my heart walking around outside of my body. The first week or so, one of us had to stay awake while you slept because we wanted to make sure you were okay.  I didn’t know then what I know now,  that you are tougher than you look. But I still always worry when you’re not smiling at me. I still wake up at least 3 times a night to make sure you’re doing fine.

It’s been tough.  We are learning each other and teaching each other at the same time. There are days I’m completely frustrated and exhausted but then, you do something new that I’ve never seen before and forget everything and am in awe again.

I love to fact that you do smile at me now. It feels like you know who I am, even though I’m not sure if you do. I can’t wait to share more with you. I want to laugh with you, dance with you, live with you. I want to teach you everything I’ve learned so you don’t make the same mistakes. I want you to see the world in the best light possible. I want you to always be happy.

I can’t believe I’m writing this letter to you. I hope you get to read it some day. For now, I’ll settle for you being the love of my life. Thank you for coming to us.

Are They Really Happy?

So I was watching this wedding video the other day and as I watched, I noticed that not at any point did the bride and groom look at each other and smile or interact. The first time they even looked like they were married to each other was during their slow dance at the reception. And then it ended. 

What’s the deal, man? Is it possible that a couple is so shy that they just don’t interact at all? Is it just me or does it seem somewhat off to you that the couple doesn’t even acknowledge each other’s presence on what is considered to be one of the more important days of their lives? Where do you even see that there is love present in this relationship? 

When I say this, I honestly mean the little moments. The one where the first time the bride comes into the room, the groom smiles or his eyes light up. The one where you can see one of them talking to the other about whatever is going on in their day. The one where you can see some inside joke or thought pass between them. 

Are we supposed to act distant and proper when we’re getting married? Because if that’s the case, I totally messed it up. 

It always makes me wonder if the couple was more interested in becoming an official couple rather than spending their lives with someone they really love. I don’t want to judge a couple that I don’t really know. I know it’s possible that this is their dynamic. Maybe it’s what makes them happy. I see couples that don’t spend that much time together in general. I wouldn’t think that was a happy relationship on both ends but then again, I want more than to just be a wife in name and in duty. 

I guess it’s all a matter of perspective. 

If anyone can explain this situation to me, I’d like to learn and understand why certain couples look like they’d rather be anywhere but with each other. Or that they are indifferent to being next to their significant other. Because I still don’t understand it. 

Looking forward to your thoughts. 

Getting Over the Negative (With Some Help from Facebook)

I decided that I’m going to do the things I avoid doing because I have some weird issue with them. For example, when I’m totally jealous of someone’s trip on Facebook or have had some issue with that person in the past, I’m going to deliberately like the photo or post that I have an issue with. I want to stop reacting the way I do to these things and just start appreciating them for what or who they are.

I’m hoping that this will create positive energy and will eventually result in changing the way I feel about things that have been negative for me in the past. Reacting negatively keeps me down and really doesn’t help me progress in life. Then comes the spiral of negativity that just keeps growing and growing until there is a breakdown. I’m hoping that reacting positively will have the same effect, only with a positive ending.

It’s hard when the obviously negative things keep coming in your face but from what I understand about the Law of Attraction, focusing on the positive will bring good things into your life. It’s a hard cycle to break out of, especially when you’ve been there for so long. Sometimes, a big change is the only way to move on. Things will get better.

Learning how to appreciate other people’s happiness is something I want to be able to do.  I don’t want to look at them and wonder why I’m not in the same place. I wouldn’t want someone else thinking that about me either. It’s definitely going to be a challenge but I’m willing to accept it. I want to believe that good wishes towards someone else will result in good wishes towards me. This might be a completely selfish motivation but it might also help both others and myself to be better people, to be more positive people.

Maybe Facebook isn’t there to show you someone’s real life (as I’ve mentioned in a previous post). Maybe it’s there to show you what’s good about the world, what is there to look forward to, what brings happiness to people. Maybe this is what we need to be reminded of the good that there is in the world so we know that our own struggles don’t define what our lives hold for us. Maybe seeing someone smile will bring a smile to us.